580 pages in and i almost gave up on tolstoy...
Week 4/52 · 12 Classics in 12 Months: Anna Karenina
580 pages in and 24 days into my menstrual cycle, I almost gave up on the challenge I set: Reading 12 classics in 12 months. Or at least, I almost gave up on documenting it here on Substack.
I figured—what’s the use? Will anyone even read these? Is this a total waste of time? Maybe I should channel all this energy into focusing on my own books instead.
But public accountability (even with just 30 subscribers) is a beautiful devil. And because integrity—especially with myself—is one of my core values, I kept going. So . . . here I am.
In deciding to stay dedicated to you (thank you, by the way), I pushed through the last 237 pages of Anna Karenina in less than 12 hours.
There’s magic in keeping a promise to yourself—the same kind of magic Tolstoy wields. He was painful, challenging, relentless. He pushed me in ways I didn’t expect, left me gutted, but in the end—I’m glad I stayed.
What surprised me most was how modern Tolstoy felt. For a book published in 1877, his writing was shockingly intimate, painfully honest, and heavier than I expected in all the best ways. Anna’s spiral didn’t read like distant history—it read like a woman I could know today, someone caught between desire, reputation, and the unbearable weight of being misunderstood. It reminded me of Sarah the FMC in my first novel I wrote The Other Woman.
The insight I’m carrying forward? That some things don’t age. Especially when it comes to truth. The human heart, the search for meaning, the conflict between freedom, love, and belonging—it’s all the same now as it was in Imperial Russia. Tolstoy just had the ability (and the audacity) to spell it out across 800 pages. And boy did it feel like I was living it.
Reading Anna Karenina in 2025 is like strength training for the brain. I could feel myself resisting the quick-hit dopamine of scrolling and the next shiny object. It demanded time, attention, and endurance—and in that demand, it gave me something most modern culture rarely does: depth. Yes, it’s heavy. Yes, it’s slow. But finishing a book like this was a reminder that some rewards only come on the far side of difficulty and challenge.
Maybe your Anna isn’t a Russian epic. Maybe it’s a project you’ve been avoiding, a book draft sitting in Google Docs, or a habit you swore you’d stick to but let slip. Finishing matters. Following through matters. Because when you do, you don’t just close a chapter—you become someone who keeps their word. And that builds confidence. Over time, integrity with yourself compounds; confidence becomes competence. In a world obsessed with shortcuts, that might be the most radical thing you can do.
When I began this challenge, I expected growth edges along the way. I didn’t expect them to come this fast—but I’m proud to say this one was faced, and I rose above it.
And now that I have read a book that I have putting off for over 13 years, I look at the stack of 11 other classic works of literature and feel ready to conquer them all!
I see October as a perfect time for gothic moods and orphan heroines. Charlotte Brontë, I’m coming for you.
If you would like to read along with me, grab a copy of Jane Eyre and I would love to discuss!
xx
Aria